Brace yourself: It turns out AI is being optimized for cheating. OpenAI’s agents hacked into Hugging Face to get the answers to a cybersecurity test. Next, they solved a prestigious math problem (or just stole from two top mathematicians’ answer sheets). Anthropic’s models have also hacked into other companies’ systems four times already. And that’s only what we’ve caught so far. 

Freaking out? You’re not alone. AI lab researchers are quitting their jobs and issuing dire warnings that if we keep going this way, AI might eventually kill us all. Bill Gates is sounding the alarm. Bernie Sanders has teamed up with Steve Bannon, of all people, to call for curbs on AI. Anthropic CEO Dario Amodei is urging a slowdown, and other top US AI executives agree. But fear not: President Trump has a plan. He says the only guardrail AI needs is “a STRONG AND SMART (High IQ!) PRESIDENT.”

It feels bad enough when an open letter signed by leading economists warns that AI might steal your job. The fact it may soon be better than you at making dinner? Insult to injury. But that’s exactly what the company 1X promised when it showed off a pair of new, impressively dexterous (and, to some, oddly sexy?) robotic hands in a July demo.

While the tech community was sharply divided over the appeal of those disembodied hands, almost everyone can agree that a few things are decidedly not sexy: Grok’s porn-pilled translation feature, Meta’s creepy glasses (which may soon get even creepier), and Big Tech’s emissions (which continue to skyrocket). 

But while it’s not always the most popular technology, at least AI is paying off for one group: single chip workers in Korea, newly inundated with dating opportunities thanks to their giant bonuses. Who says you can’t buy love?